Bill's funeral... obviously all invented, translated by me

You'll cry for sure, I warn you!
I’m here lying on my bed.
I’ve still got my clothes on.
The black tie bothers me.
I loosen it up and unbutton the first button of the shirt.
The black shirt you liked so much.
If you knew I’m wearing it you’d certainly hit me.
My dreads are ……. Pulled back into a tail.
Too long.
Maybe I should cut them.
No.
You’d kill me.
-They look so good!Non Don’t you dare cut them!- you often used to tell me.
I’d give anything to hear those words..
That voice.
That voice that enchanted millions of people.
That sometimes enchanted me, too.
I lie on one side with my shoulders at the door, as soon as I hear it opens. My Mum comes in sighing.
-Tom,could you come down for a second?-
-No...-
I hear her sigh again and go out.
I turn around on my back again.
I cry.
I don’t want her to see me cry.
I get up.
I rub my eyes with my sleeve.
My cheeks’ skin burns.
I stand up and go to the bathroom.
There is still everything on the little shelf.
Your mascara.
Your foundation.
Your black eyeliner.
Your favorite perfume.
I get it and spray some.
I breathe in.
Sweet.
Like you.
I sit down on the edge of the bath and look at my clothes.
A pair of black tight trousers.
A black shirt.
A tie… always black.
You’d be proud of my clothing today.
Unfortunatly you weren’t able to see it.
Your eyes have closed early.
Too early.
I can feel tears come again.
I don’t do anything to stop them.
I let them flow over my red skin.
I go out and after a while, I go down.
I find Mum,David,Georg,Gustav e Andreas sitting at the living-room’s table.
They stare at me.
-How do you feel?- asks David.
I don’t answer.
What fucking question is this?
I’ve just lost the most important person to me.
I’ve lost an important piece of me,
and he askes me how I feel?
Without saying anything I get the coat and go out.
The gentle breeze gets on my face making it burn even more.
Big dark clouds are above me.
I put my hands in my pocket and I start walking.
My mind is empty.
I can just see your eyes looking at me.
I can just see your wonderful smile.
Without minding I get to the cemetry.
I hesitate a little.
I get in.
Slowly. Very slowly.
Il custode stares at me.
“Yes, I’m the one who was here 4 hours ago…”I think.
I get going to the eastern part of the place.
And here you are.
They’ ve already put the piece of cold marble.
I get closer.
I pat your tombstone.
I kneel down slowly and take off some sand.
I look at your picture.
Perfect.
Impeccable as usual.
Your eyes are happy.
Your smile is happy.

I pull out a black eyeliner and rimmel.
I put them next to the flowers, a bit hidden.
-You know, even up there you’ll have to show you’re the best…and these two things are fondamental to you..-
I pause.
The lump in my throat prevents me from talking.
-Remember,behave yourself…and don’t be a prima donna or a histerical fag eh…-
I smile sadly wipe my eyes once again.
I get up and clean my pants.
I get out from the cemetry.
Lightening tears the sky and the of the roar of the thunder, the silence around me.
All this takes me back to that bloody day.
The car that slips on the wet street.
Your body on the ground.
Fans screaming in terror.
The ambulance that takes you to hospital.
Your short coma.
You waking up.
You falling asleep again.
Your…death.
And the NOTHING inside of me.
No!
I don’t wanna believe it.
You CANNOT have gone like this!
You had promised we would always stay together.
ALWAYS!
And no!
I am here…and you…you’re not.
Who will dry my tears?
Who?
Who will blame me for how I treat girls?
Who?
Who will wake me up in the middle of the night asking me to sleep with him because he had a nightmare and is scared?
Who?
Now I’m home.
Again.
And I’m writing.
I’m writing and thinking about you.
Even though you’re not here any more, I know you’ll always be by my side.
Yeah, you’ll be an angel, just for me.
Just like you used to sing in Wenn Nicht Mehr Geht.
And I...
I’ll always keep you with me.
Always in my heart.
…I love you so much Bill,and I’ ll always will…


7 years later



A 25 year-old Tom Kaulitz shut the dark cover copy-book he held in his hands and where seven years before, the day of Bill’s funeral, he had written those things.
He sighed fixing his dark blond hair.
The dreads had disappeard a few years ago.
Now there was rebel straight hair.
-Tom are you ready?-said a female voice outside the door.
-Yeah...- he replied carelessly.
The guy got up straightening his shirt with his hands.
A blond head entered the room.
-Gustav!- cried Tom surprised.
-Hey!-said Gustav getting in.
The two said hi with a warm hug.
-Seven years have already passed…-said Gustav guessing the reason for his friend’s lost look.
-Right…seven exactly today...- said Tom.
There was silence between the two.
-Dinner’s at 7…right?- asked Gustav.
-Yeah…7…-
-I’ll wait for you downstairs…-said Gustav guessing the guy wanted to be alone.
Tom found himself alone again.
He opend another tim the copy-book.
He read again what he had written seven years before.
He had found again thatold copy-book a couple of weeks before in the attic.
And all of a sudden he heard a voice singing.
A voice he knew very well.



“Wenn nichts mehr geht
Wird´ ich ein Engel sein – für dich allein
Und dir in jeder dunklen Nacht erschein´
Und dann fliegen wir weit weg von hier
Wir werden uns nie mehr verlier´n“




Tom suddenly got up thinking that someone had put it on the stereo, but then he realised there wasn’t any melody, just the voice. His brother’s voice.
Bill’s voice.
He turned against the bed.
His twin was sitting on his bed and was singing the song.
-B…Bill…?-
-Hey Tomi!- replied happily the dark head.
How was that possible?
-What are you doing here?-
-I came to see you….puff…you don’t know how much of a big deal they make out of it for just a ‘Hello’,but I convinced them…yeah,ok,it took me seven years, but I made it!-
Tom sat next to his brother keeping his tears.
-So big bro…..How’s it going?-
-You….left me…here…alone…-
Now the tears on Tom’s face were flowing like mad.
Bill lowered his look.
-Sorry…-he whispered then.
The blond got up with his nose and Bill lifted up his look again.
-You’ve changed…a lot…your dreads aren’t here any more…-
Tom nodded and the looked at his brother.
He hadn’t changed a thing.
He was just like seven years ago.
-Instead you haven’t…- said Tom.
-Right…The coolest thing is that up there you don’t get old…at least I won’t have to care about wrinkles!!- said laguhing a little and making his brother laugh a bit.
-Ah…thanks for the eyeliner and mascara…I don’t know how I could have made it….-added then.
-You’re welcome,lil bro…- replied Tom.
-So..come on…tell ,me something… said all of a sudden Bill.
-What could I tell you?-
-Well..something goof must have happend in seven years…-
Tom thought about it and then said…
-…Yeah…something has…-said then lifting his left hand and showing him his finger.
-No!You got married???Who’s that saint who got you??-
-Oh..kind as usual I can see!-
-Come on! You know I’m kidding!!Anyway come one ..tell me about her..-
-Her name’s Lynn…she’s got long dark hair and two emerald eyes..she’s simply wonderful…now it’s been two years since we got married…and we’ll soon be in three…-
-I’ll become an uncle???- asked Bill so eager.
-Yeah…it’s a babygirl…-
Bill smiled, then lowered down hi look.
-What’s up?- asked Tom.
-Sorry Tomi…I should have never left you..believe me…I fought with all my strenght to remain here…but I dind’t make it…- his voice was gently trembling.
-Bill…it’s not your fault…-the blond said to him.
The dark head sighed.
-I’d stay more..but unfortunatly my time is up for now…-
-No..I beg you…- now it was the blond’s voice trembling.
-Tomi…I’s stay with all my heart..but I gotta go…but I promise you I’ll come back…jaja.. Bill Kaulitz’s word…-
-Promise?- said Tom lifting his right hand pinky.
Bill looked at him to hook his pinky with his brother’s.
Cold took over the blond, but he could feel it.
He could feel the connection with his brother.
-Promise…- replied the dark head-….and remember…I’ll bea n angel for you…when you need me…iI’ll be there …I’ll always be by your side…always…don’t you ever gorget it…ever…-he added then.
-No,I’ll never forget it…I love you Bill…-
-Me too big bro….see you soon…- and Tom saw his brother’s figure slowly fad aways and the connection with his hand, slowly get weak.
The blond felt a loneliness feeling getting hold of his soul.
-Honey… we’re ready…- said a female voice opening the door.
A dark haired girl entered the room.
-Lynn…- he said, while tears were falling down on his cheeks fast.
-Sweety..what’s going on?- she asked worried, getting closer to her husband.
-Bill…he…I…I’ve seen him again…-
Lynn looked at him without understanding.
-He…he was here…- said the blond putting his hand on the bed and feeling something under it.
It wasn’t the sheets.
It was something soft.
He turned around and so a white feather..
He grabbed it and showed it to his wife.
Lynn looked at him with her eyes full of tears.
-Honey…- said then hugging him and crying in silence.
-You know, he’s happy to become an Uncle…-
Lynn looked at his husband in his face and smiled.
-Yeah?-
-Yeah yeah..he was so eager…too bad he had to go away…otherwise I would have made you meet him…but he’s promised to come back…And next time you’ll see him...-
Lynn looked at her husband smiling.
She knew he wasn’t mad.
He had seen him and believed him with no doubt.
-Yes,Tom…I’ll see him…-He said and then gave him a soft kiss on his lips.
-I’m coming…you go downstairs…-
The girl nodded and went out.
Tom stared at the feather he held in his hand.
He looked, one more time, at the copy-book he held in his hand.
He opened it and took a pen.
He placed the feather in it and thought.
He thought hard what to write but then he wrote a few simple words.



Wenn nichts mehr geht
Wird´ ich ein Engel sein – für dich allein



He said so...and I believe him...I know he’s not lying….

[Carmen... die *KlavierFee*]

It is invented but it is beautiful it made me cry and now i am listening to wenn nichts mehr geht

i don't usualy cry over these sort of things but omggg this made me cry VERY BADLLY!!!! my god could you explain who wrote this

i dont wanna know what made the person write that, but it is simply beautiful...it really made me cryand its kinda odd, but my friend and i currently in the process of writing a story in which tom dies...and all the stuff tht follows

Just [ B E A U T I F U L ]
Made me cry ='[[

gr8 work & keep it up =]]

loved it loadz !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
but didnt understand the italian words :X

OMG I LOVE IT SOOO MUCH
Im crying so much rite now
Its just beautiful!!!!

Tokio.Hotel.Is.My.Lyf wrote:

OMG I LOVE IT SOOO MUCH
Im crying so much rite now
Its just beautiful!!!!

*huggz hayley*

are you k? =[[[

Nope i wasnt okaii ..
I cried myself to sleep last night cos of that storyish thing it was sooo touching !!

Tokio.Hotel.Is.My.Lyf wrote:

Nope i wasnt okaii ..
I cried myself to sleep last night cos of that storyish thing it was sooo touching !!

ohhhhhhhhhhhhh =[[[ if you ever need something, i am by your side

Aww thanks XD
Me 2 !

omg its rly impressive.... i cried all day thinking of all the anti-th fans who would want this to happen

waa this is great you should write a book

thx u guys!! but I'm not the one who wrote it!! the writer is unknown but I just translated it into English!! it's touching, isn't it?!?!?! :'(
anyway, I'll edit the italian words, sorry I must have skipped them! ^^

If somebody had read my previous comment, I excuse myself from the bottom of my heart because I was wrong, forgive me

** M!Ss_Kau|!tZ ** wrote:

If somebody had read my previous comment, I excuse myself from the bottom of my heart because I was wrong, forgive me

i read it but said nothing wat was that about??

Oh no nothing, it was just crazyness, stupidity and perhaps because I was sleepy too at that time XD XD

it s a beautiful story.. but it made me cry so much.. i dont ever want to think about anything so horrible as Bill d.. d.. i cant say it! who ever wrote it must really have guts, cuz i would just drown in my own tears if i ever wrote some thing like that..

it's soo beautiful ... while i was reading i imagined the whole scene .... it was so sad !!

omg..i crying

it's rally sad

and soo good


omg ..im listening to the song and crying
i know emtional........but not like that

yeah, it is good... cos you get to create in your mind the scenes, since it's written so well *-*